- Start with work projects that obviously allow for multiple workers. Folding laundry is how we began our family work experiences. The youngest child folded washcloths. Everyone could participate and work at the same time on the same task. Gardening or yard work might be a great place to start.
- Ease into family work. Pick times to have everyone tidy together, such as before bed, after meals, or right before a working parent arrives home. Resist the urge to tear up the chore charts and fling them into the trash until after you have established family work as a habit.
- Accept the idea that children will not clean to your standards at first. They may resist working together. Things might get hard. The results are worth it! I promise it will get better.
- Family work happens even if some people are away from the home. Those family members may be asked to do a solo task when they arrive home, or they may not. Parents choice.
- The household manager (usually Mom in our house, but occasionally Dad or big sister) keeps a list of rotating chores if it helps with organizing and prioritize cleaning chores. There are many websites and books that suggest how often different chores need to be accomplished. We started with some of those and then combined and cut to tailor it to our needs. Involving your children in the process may or may not be helpful. Choose your adventure.
- Be prepared for discovering that your children do not have much stamina when it comes to working or that they never really grasped how to clean. Time for training, which is much easier since you are all working together.
Some examples of how we have implemented family work:
- It's afternoon and Dad is heading home soon. We gather in the front room to tidy. No scrubbing or wiping for this cleaning time. We briefly discuss what areas/rooms of the house need to be tidied up. Children choose which of the options they will work in. Often younger children choose and an older buddy who will help them stay on task is assigned (Mom or older sibling). We set a buzzer for five or ten minutes and work on picking up and putting items away. Once a room is clear, another space may be chosen if there is still time left.
- During our morning family reading time, Mom reads aloud while the children (and Dad if he is home) work. The work at this time is always the same so there isn't any need for charts or direction: laundry sorted, bathroom wiped down, dishwasher unloaded, dishwasher reloaded, look for things that need to be put away. This is my favorite result of family work, because the reading aloud actually helps them enjoy the working time. Wait to attempt something like this until family work is established.
- We finish dinner and everyone clears their own dishes. For some reason, my two youngest still need to be reminded often that this is their responsibility even though it never changes. Mom or Dad will say "let's clean up from dinner" or list some things that need to be done. We sometimes ask the children what they see that needs to be done. We work together to accomplish the various tasks. Full confession: This is the idealized version. We often have places to go after dinner so only a few family members will be free to actually clean up.
- Bedrooms are a mess and we need to tidy and vacuum. We have two bedroom for the children, and they are expected to keep them neat. Their ability and willingness to do this has increased with family work and growing up. The family meets together for family work time and the household manager talks about the bedrooms needing to be tidied and vacuumed. We all go into one room after another or we might split up into smaller teams. Older children who can work independently may be clean alone, or may be asked to be a buddy with a smaller child. Mom or Dad always have a buddy. We often use a timer to help us work quickly.
See my other posts on Family Work: No More Chore Systems and Problem Behaviors and Some Ways to Approach Them.
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